The daily “grind” of work life really does provide a sudden wake up call. I know I don’t have a labor intense job, but as time goes by little things build up to make me wonder, “What am I doing here?”
Being from the woods and having to transplant myself to the largest metropolitan area in the United States is never an easy task. Even after almost five years in the concrete jungle, there are still things I will never be able to comprehend or understand about life and humankind.
It seems like every year is just like the last one, on a continuous loop to the point I know what will happen next. Departments go through their differences where no outcome is ever in sight and I, being stuck in the middle of it, have to go against my instincts and stay quiet knowing what continues to happen will be the norm.
The only time I can get away from it all and gather myself is in the Summer. Three months of less work, less stress, less contact with what modern civilization calls “people”. I’m sorry, but people are not supposed to be what I have noticed around my area. I’m not saying where I come from is all rainbows and unicorns, but when there is a conflict it is dealt with and doesn’t drag out day after day after month after year.
Thankfully I am in the home stretch of work for the time being. To celebrate I will be getting away to the Catskills with Queen Bee for an extended weekend. I will be somewhat back in my natural element and can focus on what I enjoy and also teach her some skills to keep my mind busy and forget what is back in the city. It will be black fly season and I don’t care! I will have my fishing gear, a primitive site, cast iron skillet, a tent, some food, and just live simply for a few days. No phone, no technology, nothing to connect me to the lifestyle I am now in because of student loan debt.
This will hopefully be the kick in the ass I need to re-evaluate my life and what I am doing and what I should be doing to make me happy. After all, if you are not happy then what are you doing in life?